I'm Okay

How many time have you said that you are okay - when actually you're not? 
Too many - im sure, I have many a time - simply because I don't want people to know that the day was a bad day and I was struggling, or because I'm simply fine with coping by myself or just because I cant be bothered to explain what is actually the matter, or because nothing is the matter, or because the thing that is the matter sound really stupid, its personal, you don't want people telling everyone. All these reasons; Jessie J has taught me well that "Its Okay, Not To Be Okay"  - Sure it is and those people who matter most will understand that.
I know my friends do, I have bad days often sometimes more than I have good days - but at the end of each day one of my girlies or guys are there making it all better - sewing the pieces back together again and making sure that each night I go to bed with a smile on my face.
The most comforting thing is that, if I say - Yeah I'm fine, or, Sure I'm okay - somewhere someone always knows that I'm not apparently they can see it in my eyes or written on my face. Knowing that people do care is a great feeling - but a better feeling is knowing that you care for them too.
I care for my friends so much sometimes im sure that its too much!
But for my true friends who are currently reading this - because I know you stalk me!!

I will  always be there if not in person - in spirit and in mind.
You guys are always there at the back of my mind dancing away - making me continually worry about you - and trust me - I do!! But for every second of worry - I have a moments relief when you are there providing me with a shoulder - a hug.

You guys are the best friends I could have asked for - I don't deserve you. After this year - I'm really glad I have friends like you - without you my world would cease to exist. You make me - me and that is something special - because honestly I've not seen the real me for a long time - and bit by bit, second by second, week by week, the more I spent time with you guys - the more I see the person I truly am - Thank-you.

The girl whose not tall enough - One day you will be taller than me and I will have to stand on tippy toes to reach your shoulder.
My little ballerina -  I don't think you know I write this - but Ima post a link to you so you can just read this - I am sorry for the shit I put you through - all the stress and strain - all the tears I've cried all the words I've burdened you with all the times I got stroppy and moody and mean - I love you girly!!!
To my favourite little wolf turtle - My confidential little secret keeper - the love i contain for you is huge amount - you make me laugh soo much!! And you listen to me when I just need to spill and thankyou for wiping away my tears.
To my Laurie - I relate to you so bad :) sometimes you remind of myself and other times I remind myself of you - I love you - you make me laugh and I know that you are always there even if its really early in the morning or realy late a night - you are only a text away.!!
To the one I missed, Hazel White Paint-  What can I say hey - 13/14 Years its been a blast and to the future we must go - always and forever girly - I cant even say how much I love you because I dont think the words yet exist!
Jennifer -I will always be thankful. I love you. That is all!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx